50​/​90 2019

by John Vermeersch

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about

Music by John Vermeersch

Cover art by Emily Glewwe

credits

released July 4, 2019

license

all rights reserved

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about

John Vermeersch Shoreview, Minnesota

Thanks for stopping by! These are my demos, so if you're new here, I recommend checking out my band instead: lonelyenclave.bandcamp.com

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Contact John Vermeersch

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Track Name: I Don't Feel a Thing
Verse 1:
Everybody knows each other
Where the hell have I been?
The doors are boarded up and locked
I'm living in the parking lot

Everybody tells me
I should turn a blind eye to the past
These are the best days of our lives
Except they've been the worst of mine

Chorus:
I don't feel a thing
When I'm out with you
My heart's on a string
It's all going wrong again

The people I know
Disappear like the days
When I'm not alone
And things are okay

Verse 2:
I'm afraid that summer's leaving
Like everybody else did
I cling to people who are gone
And paint my false perceptions on

And they're all hanging out without me
What the hell do I do?
I hide and then what happens next?
This whole time I've been incorrect

Chorus:
I don't feel a thing
When I'm out with you
My heart's on a string
It's all going wrong again

The people I know
Disappear like the days
When I'm not alone
And things are okay
Track Name: Why Did You Give Up?
Verse 1:
I've tried to make this work for you
It doesn't matter what I do
You just fuck off to someone new

I've waited days for no reply
And all I've done is ask you why
You just can't seem to say goodbye

Pre-Chorus:
I've seen you flip the script on bad days
You could never tell a lie
Regarding me and you, I don't know what to do
Have you got an alibi?

Chorus:
I wanna talk to you
If it takes all night
Cause you've gone back on all your kindness

And when the sunshine falls asleep
I'll be awake, thoughts on repeat
Why did you give up on me?

Verse 2:
I'll try harder to ignore
The way that you've been keeping score
And ruining how it was before

Although I'm smiling, you won't wave
There's no pretending it's okay
Without a word, you've pushed me far away

Pre-Chorus:
I've seen you flip the script on good friends
I've heard you tell a million lies
Regarding you and me, you don't know what I've seen
This cold reflection of a queen

Chorus:
I wanna talk to you
If it takes all night
Cause you've gone back on all your kindness

And when the sunshine falls asleep
I'll be awake, thoughts on repeat
Why did you give up on me?
Track Name: Live Forever (Die Tonight)
Verse 1:
I've got a fever that's going up
I'm like a flickering light bulb tonight:
You said it without thinking, like it would mean nothing
But for the rest of my life

Pre-Chorus:
I'll ride constellations
And through the frustration
Devotion will follow us through

It all seems so pointless
Most lives aren't important
I know that it won't matter soon

Chorus:
I want to live forever
Without a second chance
Even if the sun burns out

Though I know I'll die tonight
So I have to tell you
Before the moon goes down

Verse 2:
Let's make a memory we can't forget
For when we're finally not kids anymore
I know what you're doing and three words could ruin
What stars are aligning us for

Pre-Chorus:
Youth takes a moment to splinter apart
Inside the palm of your hand

And time is exhausting
We'll all be forgotten
Apparently that's just the plan

Chorus:
I want to live forever
And ad lib all the lines
Even if the sun burns out

Though I know I'll die tonight
So I have to tell you
Before the moon goes down

*solo*
Track Name: Everybody Leave Me Alone Forever
Verse 1:
It's just like yesterday
I woke up and nothing's changed
You don't have to believe this is true
But I'm gonna make it happen

Chorus:
Everybody's gone and you're moving on

Verse 2:
Head hurts and I'm sore
I don't remember too well anymore
You don't have to believe this is true
But you know, I really love you

Chorus:
Everybody's gone and you're moving on

Verse 3:
I'm drunk and I'm sad
It's not gonna work out and that's too bad
Even though you believe all my bullshit
It doesn't make a difference

Chorus:
Everybody's gone and you're moving on
Everybody's gone, I guess life goes on
Track Name: A Better Friend
Verse 1:
I had an awful night
Singing songs you used to like
Hopelessly hoping for more time

I wanna meet again
I wanna be your biggest fan
And the lead singer of your band

Pre-Chorus:
Unsevered, forever
Like I'd imagined
I've had many fantasies
Where we were like best friends

Chorus:
If a star should leave the sky
It might not burn out bright
It doesn't mean it wasn't ever there

If a day should pass me by
I can't go back again
I wish I'd been a better friend

Verse 2:
Our temporary lives
Are as fragile as our pride
Good plans get pushed off to the side

I wish that you could stay
One more technicolor day
Although I don't know what I'd say

Pre-Chorus:
Though it's useless, I still regret
Not trying harder to know you
I had many fantasies
But none of them came true

Chorus:
If a star should leave the sky
It might not burn out bright
It doesn't mean it wasn't ever there

If a day should pass me by
I can't go back again
I wish I'd been a better friend

*solo*

Chorus:
If a star should leave the sky
It might not burn out bright
It doesn't mean it wasn't ever there

If a day should pass me by
I can't go back again
I wish I'd been a better friend
Track Name: Warning Signs
Chorus:
It's been too long for me to hesitate
Warning signs appear when it's too late
I think that you think that this is a game
You would never break the chain

Verse 1:
I'm tired of trying to make this work for people
I know would never do the same
It's all about appearances, so hide the bodies
And look for someone good to blame

Pre-Chorus:
Why take that second chance?
You'll screw it up again
You have a way with words, but you don't have a way with actions
I'm sick of trying to be your friend

Chorus:
It's been too long for me to hesitate
Warning signs appear when it's too late
And I think that you think that this is a game
You would never break the chain

Verse 2:
It's hard for me to buy that this is you now
I guess you lost another screw
If you're an asshole, then you're just an asshole
It doesn't matter what I do

Pre-Chorus:
This time, it's gone beyond a doubt
You've become so easy to cut out
Your doppelganger eyes tell a different story
Than what's coming from your mouth

Chorus:
It's been too long for me to hesitate
Warning signs appear when it's too late
And I think that you think that this is a game
You would never break the chain

*solo*

Pre-Chorus:
It doesn't matter what you say
Our old relationship has changed
A shadow of a friend hiding in the corner
With no more sympathy to spare

Chorus:
It's been too long for me to hesitate
Warning signs appear when it's too late
And I think that you think that this is a game
You tried erasing his first name

It's too late for you to compensate
Our DNA's about to seperate
And I know that you know you've broken our trust
Say goodbye to all of us

It's been too long for me to hesitate
Warning signs appear when it's too late
Track Name: When We Were Young
Verse 1:
It's easy when you learn to play along
But don't get stuck in it
Crack jokes and lie about your favorite songs
Pretend you're into this

Pre-Chorus
I don't want a reaction
I just want you to be genuine
Try to make a distraction
So you never have to make a friend

Chorus:
Taking the thunder as it comes
You try to pretend you're in the sun
Look up, I know you're lying, baby

I used to be your number one
I understood when we were young
The ones we were were meant to die

Verse 2:
It's easy if you just dissociate
People are tools to you
Don't bother learning to communicate
Deflection works fine too

Chorus:
Taking the thunder as it comes
You try to pretend you're in the sun
Look up, I know you're lying, baby

I used to be your number one
I understood when we were young
The ones we were were meant to die

Bridge:
Sleeping, I'm still sleeping
Dreaming, you're just dreaming
The things we'll never be again can dance around inside your head
But leaving, I'm still leaving

Chorus:
Taking the thunder as it comes
You try to pretend you're in the sun
Look up, I know you're lying, baby

I used to be your number one
I understood when we were young
The ones we were were meant to die

Bridge:
Sleeping, I'm still sleeping
Dreaming, you're just dreaming
The people that we're s'posed to be can die a million times but see
I'm leaving, I'm still leaving
Track Name: I Miss This
Verse 1:
My life has been a rising action
But I don't know where it goes
The resolution's nowhere close

I think it's time I told you something
I'm not sure how you'll react
But I've been living in a flashback

Verse 2:
Last year was such a disappointment
I've gotta dig through the debris
And find out who I wanna be

But for now, I'll put on faces
Every conversation's an interview
Just one more motion to go through

Pre-Chorus:
Especially in winter, I tend to think about
The people that I used to know
Dance on the walls, cast shadows in the air
Your afterglow is my plateau

Chorus:
And I miss this, baby
And I miss this, baby
No matter where you are
No matter where you are

And I miss this, baby
And I miss this, baby
No matter where you are
No matter where you are

Verse 3:
Although my life was like a movie
I think subconsciously I knew
That someday soon I'd end up screwed

And I can't come back uninvited
I'd always find a new excuse
I'd give my life to dance with you

Pre-Chorus:
How many books have I written about you?
How many more do I have left?
We're so far apart, becoming memories
Eventually, we'll both forget

Chorus:
And I miss this, baby
And I miss this, baby
No matter where you are
No matter where you are

And I miss this, baby
And I miss this, baby
No matter where you are
No matter where you are

Outro:
The lobby was cold
I went upstairs alone
Track Name: Why Do Moments Pass?
Verse 1:
Are you getting high
And lonely?
Thunder storms all night
Drive slowly

Self medication's the best way
To fix things sometimes

Singing in your car
Through static
Spilling secret songs
In traffic

I can't be your therapist
But I can be there when you need me to be

Chorus:
Bright highway lights
Shine in your eyes
Not sure if I want to see the sunrise

But if it's with you
I guess it's alright, then
Wave goodbye, say good night

Verse 2:
Why do moments pass?
I hate it
I wanna live this one
In excess

Things might be fine
But if they fall apart, I wanna stop time

You say that we're sixteen
Or younger
We won't age a day
All summer

But summer takes an instant
The clock is broken and I can't fix it

Chorus:
Take up my time
More everyday
Your pallette is perfect when autumn turns gray

And when I'm with you
I feel so much better
And the sun starts to fade

*solo*

Verse 3:
When it's said and done
It's worth it
Hope you're happy too
You've earned it

One day we'll die
But for now, let's let time pass us by
Track Name: Punch Line
Verse 1:
It might just be the minor things
But minor things add up
Thorns grow much deeper into sides

These microscopic moments
Can lead to a lack of trust
And without trying, you will hide

Pre-Chorus:
Cause everybody's busted up
And they keep so many secrets
Who to tell, who not to tell?
I don't know

Chorus:
I'm not a friend, I'm a punch line
My relationships all fall apart by their design

I'm watching the trust combusting
There's nothing worth discussing
It makes me feel disgusting
I can't help anyone

Verse 2:
Subvert the expectation
But don't do it very loud
Too vulnerable and I'll get hurt

Go tell our other friends
I'm sure that they can help you out
I'll think about what I am worth

Pre-Chorus:
Cause no one ever needs my help
They just shut me out completely
I probably fucked it up
It's all my fault

Chorus:
I'm not a friend, I'm a punch line
My relationships all fall apart with passing time

I'm watching the trust combusting
There's nothing worth discussing
It makes me feel disgusting
I can't help anyone

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